Today, in The Hallway of Beginnings, a soft golden tinge has crept into the shadowed light that inhabits this place, and there is a whisper of sunlight and perhaps warmth that I have not noticed before. I wonder what kinds of changes are occurring in my inner landscape, what far reaching effects this process is having upon my world. It occurs to me that this is a strange event to discover in this, probably the least visually appealing of the entire Thoth deck, at least to me….. and all of a sudden I feel as if I am rushing in where angels fear to tread, as I rise quickly from the wooden chair and walk up the stairs. It comes to me that I might be too eager to get this card over and done with, so I stop outside the door, and try to compose myself… I take a deep breath and remind myself not to rush, remembering that every step I take through this process leads me to a further insight into this card, another subtlety that I had not realized before.
I walk tentatively through the heavy wooden door into a rich, green and verdant landscape. The lush grass is plentiful and exudes a luxurious emerald hue that could become overwhelming if you looked at it for too long. There is a vitality here that is powerful, exotic and almost threatening, as the energy leaps and jumps in its intense efforts to escape from the earth.
Dotted around the landscape there are pairs of animals, a pair of sleek and shining buffalo stand some way off, lazily munching, looking like they have had no need to move from where they are, ever again, and I wonder if they are an earlier version of the beasts of burden in The Ten of Wands. Closer to me I see a pair of glossy and shining horses; they are not eating, just standing motionless in each others company.
I approach them slowly and ask them what they represent, and they say that they are the transforming power of love and sexuality. I look at their strong bodies and the richness of the landscape, they are surrounded by food and the luxury of life and have clearly had enough to eat and drink. They now just seem to be waiting for something else to happen, for they seem mesmerized, catatonic almost, in this soporific land of satiety.
I am beginning to feel drugged and heavy… sleepy even… and I look around again to see if there is anything else to be discovered here, wondering as I do so whether I will fall asleep here… surrounded by plenty, no need to move, no need to think or even feel, to just drift aimlessly, feeding continuously like a bovine creature in this seductive field of dreams. Raising my eyes with some effort, I see off to the side, a small building, and realise that Malachi must be here, I have not met him for a while now, and I am interested to see what he has to say here, in this place. Feeling happy to be finding Malachi again, as in all honesty I thought he had disappeared from my journey, I push the door open into his cottage and adjust my eyes to the dimmer light after the glare of the sunshine outside.
Malachi is busy in his house as usual; making things… he is always making things, mending things, resurrecting what seems old and worn, finding the gold in the darkness, and he welcomes me in with his usual calm kindness.
I ask him if he can guide me to find the true meaning of this place, and he nods silently and leads me back outside. He points up to the sky, and tells me that the eagle is flying high above me, and I quickly look up. Sure enough there he is, a huge eagle, hanging like a sentinel in the clear blue sky soaring lazily on the thermal currents, governing the heavens in his exalted state. For an instant I connect with him, looking down on this stultifying land with the clarity of extreme elevation, and from this noble and exalted state I see that there is another side to this card, a different aspect, a clearer landscape, just out of my field of vision. I quickly thank Malachi for I know that my time here is drawing to a close, and I head off to explore what lies over the green hill.
Gradually the grass thins out and becomes shorter, eventually giving way to marram grass and sand, and I find myself standing on the edge of a vast white sandy beach playing host to the crashing waves that are breaking noisily on the shore line.
I see that the two black horses have also found the beach, and that they are galloping at full speed through the white foam, their hooves thundering on the hard sand, expressing with joy and abandonment all the sustenance and vitality that they have taken in from the green fields above. They are ecstasy in motion, channeling the power and allowing it to flow, their passion in the cleansing water cutting through the sickly sweet and cloying feelings that seemed to linger after the field of dreams.
I no longer feel drugged and heavy, but alive and vital, refreshed and energetic… and I can see how easy it would be to stay forever within the safety of the green land, to try to hold on to the pleasure it brings and the illusion and security of total fulfillment. I watch the horses as they enjoy the freedom of life, releasing, flowing, cleansing and purifying….ready to face their next adventure. I embrace the sense of freedom and pure lust for life that these horses have given me and I watch them wheeling and turning, exploring all the possibilities that their game offers them…. but it is time to leave them now, and I turn away as they continue to choose to follow their passions, fueled on by their freedom, their power and their zest for life, as they enter again and again and again into the healing waters of the ocean… the effervescence of eternal life.
The Seven of Cups
Venus in Scorpio
The Lord of Illusionary Success