Today, today……a new day….. a day to emerge, to accept, to walk free. To walk as one who has passed the test, who has embraced the past, and who is ready to start again.
I walk the stairs with difficulty today, the steps floating past both effortlessly yet also burdening me. Butterflies beat their fragile wings in my heart, seeking incessantly to escape from my chest, and time is in slow motion. It is one of those moments in life when I can sense the very earth turning beneath my feet, feel my heart opening to receive some wondrous gift that I know will take me soaring higher than anything that I have ever met before, but that I know will also dash me from that height, a heavenly catastrophe that will fill my soul with passion and then leave me weeping as if for the rest of time. The Sun stands still at these times, a solstice point, poised, breath held, watching the foolishness of human hearts, their bold and hopeful bravery and their eternal capacity for suffering.
I reach the door, and with a wish in my eyes and a prayer in my mouth, I bow my head and pass through the portal, the curtain yielding easily today as it shatters into a kaleidoscopic vista of green and gold, crimson and blue and I step into the land of The Fool.
I walk into a world of gorgeously vibrant and palpable colors and a pulsating energy that permeates my skin, filling my veins and muscles until I feel like some sort of superhero. The strength leaks into every tiny crevice and corner of my body, and where there was only tiredness and the scent of fear, I become filled with purpose and life. Luscious green hills wound in swathes of flowers, roll away into a distance dotted with stands of trees in full leaf. The landscape emanates an intense and powerful energy, it is the image of the very essence of Spring itself, a place of beginnings, of potential, the first kiss, the tentative touch, the first step that leads into the future.
I step forward into this land with the surge of new life flowing through me like a raging storm, and run effortlessly as I explore the hills and fields around me, galloping like a horse as I am filled with the pure energy of life and all its potential.
In a desire to understand this energy better, I lie on the soft warm earth and I allow the vibrations of her energy to fill me with hope and understanding, and as I do so I feel myself melting into the grass, becoming soft and malleable, becoming one with her. Gradually I feel myself being sucked into the earth, and I allow this to happen, and I go down, squeezed and sucked until I emerge on the other side as some kind of sea creature swimming in a fabulous underwater world. I explore with the agility of a seal, darting, playing, cavorting in caves and playing hide and seek with the fish. I find that the speed that I can attain is incredible and there seems to be no limits to what I can achieve here.
I feel that it is time to move on, and I emerge from the water like a missile, soaring through the air, to land on my two feet upon a high mountain ridge. And I am a giant now, scaling the highest mountains, dancing on the roof of the world. I stand balanced on one foot, perfectly poised upon the peak of a snowy mountain top, and I am exhilarated and alive, cartwheeling through the sky with grace and with glee. The cold air snaps on my skin and my strength is unlimited, the strength of a pure heart, and I know that in this moment that I can do absolutely anything that I choose and that with all the world at my feet, I am truly invincible.
This vision fades slowly, and I emerge standing once again in the green fields near where I arrived. I am behind a table, filled with maps and charts, and I am searching the horizon for signs, and many different scenes fill my vision. I look into the distance and I see an ever changing vista of the futures of men, scenes filled with beauty and with horror, apocalyptic futures walk hand in hand with the resurrection of love and life. I see the written futures of the tribes of the world and the beating heart of humanity, and to see it all described thus ages me, and I am now an old man with long white hair and a grey beard. My eyes weep at the fate of humanity, and I despair at the loss of the potential that I have seen and the frailty of human nature. We start so pure, with such bright burnished longing, so full of hope, our dreams whole, untainted and powerful. What effort it is to hold the vision, to see both the dream and the reality and to bind it together in manifestation, to accept the imperfections that lie within our own hearts.
I sink back onto the ground, a tired old man, heavy with the visions that I have seen. I lie slowly back on the soft grass, resting my bones in the gentle arms of the earth and I allow her to embrace me once again, let her run her hands over me, to smooth away the pain and the heaviness from my weary heart. Slowly, I can feel the stress and the tightness leaving me, soothed away into the grass and the plants and the trees, and I lie there, at peace. I am at once calm, empty and relaxed, I recognize that my fertility is endless, and that I will be born again; that I will live to dream once more, in this endless cycle of life.
O The Fool
The Elemental Trump of Air
The Spirit of the Aether
Association with Uranus
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